Day 2, Part 2

So I'm going to finish writing about yesterday!

For lunch, I made a big and delicious salad.

I mixed together romaine lettuce with radishes, jicama, avocados, kalamata olives, sunflower seeds, and broccoli. I also made my own dressing to put on it: 

It looks gross, but it's so yummy! It's made with nonfat plain yogurt, canola oil, fresh parsley, lemon juice and garlic. I don't think it's very fattening, and I like that I know exactly what's in my dressing.

So my salad was delicious! I am absolutely obsessed with jicama ever since I tried this winter salad recipe from Bon Appetit. This salad I made yesterday is a smaller version of it, and it's amazing. But seriously, jicama is my new favorite thing. I never thought a root could be so pleasantly sweet and crunchy and amazing. I want to add it to every salad I make!

After lunch I tried really, really hard not to eat. When I'm sitting around doing nothing is when I am most likely to eat just because I'm bored. I ended up having a Weight Watchers toffee ice cream bar. I don't think those are terrible for you and it's a nice way to calm my sweet tooth.

I wish I took a picture of the dinner I made, but I was in such a rush to eat it that I totally forgot! I picked a recipe off of Cooking Light and made it for my family: Orzo with zucchini and tomatoes. It was really really yummy but needed a protein -- it tasted more like a side dish. I sauteed fresh zucchini with canned diced tomatoes (which are actually delish!), roasted red peppers and some herbs. It mixed in with the cooked orzo and crumbled goat cheese, which made the whole dish creamy and wonderful, and a little pecorino romano cheese. It was really good and definitely something I will keep in mind for the future.

As the night went on I was still hungry -- my dinner just wasn't filling enough! I ended up getting a hot chocolate from Dunkin Donuts. This wasn't as bad as what I would have ended up doing if I wasn't with Mark, because all I wanted was chips or mac and cheese. So I know the hot chocolate was a bad choice, but I don't know. It's hard to let go of so many bad habits at once!

I hope I can do good over the weekend! That's usually the hardest time for me, but I'm really going to try hard. I've found myself hungry a lot lately and I feel like that might be a good sign. Today I woke up STARVING, and while I know what I would LIKE for breakfast, I'm going to make something healthy. I'm also going to make that salad again for lunch and maybe have a small side of vegetarian chili to keep me filled up. For dinner, I'm not sure yet -- I kind of want to make something but I don't know what to make.

Also, I'm going out with my friends tonight. Lately, I don't have the urge to get wasted and drink everything in sight. I don't know why, exactly, but a part of it is that drinking honestly makes my stomach hurt really bad. I hate going home with that horrible feeling even after only drinking a little bit. So when I go out tonight, I'm probably going to have one drink and going to make it a vodka/cranberry or something. I just don't want to drink that much! 

Well I'll write about my food adventures today later! Wish me luck :)

Day 2

Last night wasn't terrible. After lunch, what I really wanted was some kind of dessert -- instead, I got a big fruit salad and a hazelnut coffee. The fruit salad was delicious -- I can't wait for the summer so fruit is in season and I can make my own at home! For the train ride home I was starving. Even though I really wanted a bag of fresh popcorn from Penn Station, I got dried apples and a Luna bar. Both kept me full through dinner -- my mom made vegetarian chili and I only had one bowl.

The vegetarian chili my mom makes is so yummy! It has all kinds of beans and is made with bulger wheat, so it's super super filling. All you need is a little cheese on top and it's a perfect warm meal. Since becoming a vegetarian, there are some things that I really miss, and chili has always been one of them. But this vegetarian one is almost as good!

Today had a great start.

For breakfast, I had a sliced pear, a sliced banana and 2 egg whites. It was really good, I love having fruit for breakfast! I also had a bowl of dried vanilla almond Special K and a cup of hazelnut coffee. I kind of wish I had skipped the cereal, but it did all keep me full.

I am now craving a big healthy salad! I LOVE when I crave healthy foods! I'm going to run to the food store and buy some avocados and olives and some other yummy things to put in the salad. I also want to make something super healthy for dinner -- but no ideas yet!

Lunch

I was starving for lunch today! I tried to wait as long as possible, but only made it to 1:00.

I went to City Chow, which is the cafe in the Equinox gym across the street from my building. Since it's in Equinox, I have to assume that it's pretty healthy. It tastes healthy, so hopefully it is!

I had three vegetable sides. I know I should probably get a little bit more protein into my lunch so it keeps filling me up, but I like the three sides thing. It keeps me pretty full.

I had roasted broccoli in lemon, brown rice with scallions radicchio and raisins, and cannellini beans, chickpeas, lima beans and zucchini in lemon. Everything was really delicious and healthy-tasting.

I love going to Equinox because it feels like I'm actually getting healthy food that I could have made myself. Anyway, it was so yummy and I didn't want it to end! I also got a bottle of water because I know I don't drink enough of it -- and I'm super tired today so I know I'm probably going to want to get coffee later, and I don't want to get dehydrated.

Bikini Season

Here is something I have learned about me: no matter what weight I am, I will always wear a bikini in the summer.

Nothing can keep me away from the beach, or away from baking in the sun on a towel in the sand. Even if I'm so concerned about my weight that I will refuse to wear tank tops without a sweater when going out, I will still show up to the beach in a tiny bikini.

I need to lose weight this year. Because even though I will wear that bikini, I will feel completely miserable in it.

I do NOT get the chance to relax at the beach. Instead, I lay there, thinking that every person who walks by is looking at me in disgust, thinking that anyone around me laughing is laughing at how fat I look in the bikini. I can't sit comfortably because I know I will just look fat. It makes me miserable, it honestly does.

Here are two bikinis I plan on ordering and I want to feel COMFORTABLE in them.

This is a huge part of my motivation to lose weight -- Operation Beach. 

New. AGAIN.

I could start this post off by writing about how much I suck at this whole weight loss thing and how and why I failed the last few times, but I really want a fresh start -- so I'm not going to do that.

I can't try any crazy diets this time. I love food and I love eating and I hate being bored with things. I need some sort of structure and I'm hoping writing in here will provide that. Here are my ideas for the weight loss I want before summer:

For Breakfast: Yogurt, egg whites, fruit. A big breakfast to fill me up, but all light things.

For Lunch: Salads, healthy sandwiches. Make my own lunch, not buy it.

For Snacks: Healthy, healthy, healthy.

For Dinner: Fish, vegetarian meals.

I'm going to try really hard not to eat after dinner. If I have to, popcorn or another low-calorie snack will have to do.

And, exercise. That's the most important thing.

Here goes.