Day 2, Part 2

So I'm going to finish writing about yesterday!

For lunch, I made a big and delicious salad.

I mixed together romaine lettuce with radishes, jicama, avocados, kalamata olives, sunflower seeds, and broccoli. I also made my own dressing to put on it: 

It looks gross, but it's so yummy! It's made with nonfat plain yogurt, canola oil, fresh parsley, lemon juice and garlic. I don't think it's very fattening, and I like that I know exactly what's in my dressing.

So my salad was delicious! I am absolutely obsessed with jicama ever since I tried this winter salad recipe from Bon Appetit. This salad I made yesterday is a smaller version of it, and it's amazing. But seriously, jicama is my new favorite thing. I never thought a root could be so pleasantly sweet and crunchy and amazing. I want to add it to every salad I make!

After lunch I tried really, really hard not to eat. When I'm sitting around doing nothing is when I am most likely to eat just because I'm bored. I ended up having a Weight Watchers toffee ice cream bar. I don't think those are terrible for you and it's a nice way to calm my sweet tooth.

I wish I took a picture of the dinner I made, but I was in such a rush to eat it that I totally forgot! I picked a recipe off of Cooking Light and made it for my family: Orzo with zucchini and tomatoes. It was really really yummy but needed a protein -- it tasted more like a side dish. I sauteed fresh zucchini with canned diced tomatoes (which are actually delish!), roasted red peppers and some herbs. It mixed in with the cooked orzo and crumbled goat cheese, which made the whole dish creamy and wonderful, and a little pecorino romano cheese. It was really good and definitely something I will keep in mind for the future.

As the night went on I was still hungry -- my dinner just wasn't filling enough! I ended up getting a hot chocolate from Dunkin Donuts. This wasn't as bad as what I would have ended up doing if I wasn't with Mark, because all I wanted was chips or mac and cheese. So I know the hot chocolate was a bad choice, but I don't know. It's hard to let go of so many bad habits at once!

I hope I can do good over the weekend! That's usually the hardest time for me, but I'm really going to try hard. I've found myself hungry a lot lately and I feel like that might be a good sign. Today I woke up STARVING, and while I know what I would LIKE for breakfast, I'm going to make something healthy. I'm also going to make that salad again for lunch and maybe have a small side of vegetarian chili to keep me filled up. For dinner, I'm not sure yet -- I kind of want to make something but I don't know what to make.

Also, I'm going out with my friends tonight. Lately, I don't have the urge to get wasted and drink everything in sight. I don't know why, exactly, but a part of it is that drinking honestly makes my stomach hurt really bad. I hate going home with that horrible feeling even after only drinking a little bit. So when I go out tonight, I'm probably going to have one drink and going to make it a vodka/cranberry or something. I just don't want to drink that much! 

Well I'll write about my food adventures today later! Wish me luck :)

Day 2

Last night wasn't terrible. After lunch, what I really wanted was some kind of dessert -- instead, I got a big fruit salad and a hazelnut coffee. The fruit salad was delicious -- I can't wait for the summer so fruit is in season and I can make my own at home! For the train ride home I was starving. Even though I really wanted a bag of fresh popcorn from Penn Station, I got dried apples and a Luna bar. Both kept me full through dinner -- my mom made vegetarian chili and I only had one bowl.

The vegetarian chili my mom makes is so yummy! It has all kinds of beans and is made with bulger wheat, so it's super super filling. All you need is a little cheese on top and it's a perfect warm meal. Since becoming a vegetarian, there are some things that I really miss, and chili has always been one of them. But this vegetarian one is almost as good!

Today had a great start.

For breakfast, I had a sliced pear, a sliced banana and 2 egg whites. It was really good, I love having fruit for breakfast! I also had a bowl of dried vanilla almond Special K and a cup of hazelnut coffee. I kind of wish I had skipped the cereal, but it did all keep me full.

I am now craving a big healthy salad! I LOVE when I crave healthy foods! I'm going to run to the food store and buy some avocados and olives and some other yummy things to put in the salad. I also want to make something super healthy for dinner -- but no ideas yet!

Lunch

I was starving for lunch today! I tried to wait as long as possible, but only made it to 1:00.

I went to City Chow, which is the cafe in the Equinox gym across the street from my building. Since it's in Equinox, I have to assume that it's pretty healthy. It tastes healthy, so hopefully it is!

I had three vegetable sides. I know I should probably get a little bit more protein into my lunch so it keeps filling me up, but I like the three sides thing. It keeps me pretty full.

I had roasted broccoli in lemon, brown rice with scallions radicchio and raisins, and cannellini beans, chickpeas, lima beans and zucchini in lemon. Everything was really delicious and healthy-tasting.

I love going to Equinox because it feels like I'm actually getting healthy food that I could have made myself. Anyway, it was so yummy and I didn't want it to end! I also got a bottle of water because I know I don't drink enough of it -- and I'm super tired today so I know I'm probably going to want to get coffee later, and I don't want to get dehydrated.

Bikini Season

Here is something I have learned about me: no matter what weight I am, I will always wear a bikini in the summer.

Nothing can keep me away from the beach, or away from baking in the sun on a towel in the sand. Even if I'm so concerned about my weight that I will refuse to wear tank tops without a sweater when going out, I will still show up to the beach in a tiny bikini.

I need to lose weight this year. Because even though I will wear that bikini, I will feel completely miserable in it.

I do NOT get the chance to relax at the beach. Instead, I lay there, thinking that every person who walks by is looking at me in disgust, thinking that anyone around me laughing is laughing at how fat I look in the bikini. I can't sit comfortably because I know I will just look fat. It makes me miserable, it honestly does.

Here are two bikinis I plan on ordering and I want to feel COMFORTABLE in them.

This is a huge part of my motivation to lose weight -- Operation Beach. 

New. AGAIN.

I could start this post off by writing about how much I suck at this whole weight loss thing and how and why I failed the last few times, but I really want a fresh start -- so I'm not going to do that.

I can't try any crazy diets this time. I love food and I love eating and I hate being bored with things. I need some sort of structure and I'm hoping writing in here will provide that. Here are my ideas for the weight loss I want before summer:

For Breakfast: Yogurt, egg whites, fruit. A big breakfast to fill me up, but all light things.

For Lunch: Salads, healthy sandwiches. Make my own lunch, not buy it.

For Snacks: Healthy, healthy, healthy.

For Dinner: Fish, vegetarian meals.

I'm going to try really hard not to eat after dinner. If I have to, popcorn or another low-calorie snack will have to do.

And, exercise. That's the most important thing.

Here goes.

Weight Watchers Results So Far

Hello! I have completed my first full week of Weight Watchers with good news: I lost 3.3 pounds! I'm really proud of myself!

I did okay this week - but I guess I did better than I thought! I started out the week doing awesome, doing everything right and not cheating, and working out. But by the end of the week, that stopped. Friday morning I got home a little later than normal and it threw off my routine. I didn't go to the gym, and I didn't feel like sticking to my diet - so I didn't. On Saturday, I had a bridal shower. I had pasta and salmon and a napoleon for lunch! It was extremely heavy - but then I didn't really eat anything else all day because I was so full. On Sunday, I didn't eat much but still didn't count points. I did do a little exercise though. So I have to say, I was surprised to lose the 3 pounds.

But it feels great! I know 3 pounds is not a lot, but it's just nice to have lost SOMETHING. It would have been such a let down to not lose anything in the first week. Those 3 little pounds are inspiring me to do EVEN BETTER this week! Imagine what I can lose if I work out everyday and eat right EVERY day and not just on the weekdays! I know that realistically, probably NOT much more than 3 pounds, but if I can lose 3 pounds each week, that is so much better than nothing.

I've done okay today. I actually have been so busy at my internship (I shouldn't even be writing in here right now), that I haven't even eaten or thought about eating. I had a venti non-fat vanilla latte from Starbucks - 6 points right there! It looks like that's my breakfast, since it's already noon. I'm going to have soup from Hale & Hearty again for lunch and since I have the extra points available, maybe I'll get something else little. I was also going to run to Duane Reade or something to get some carrots for a snack later.

In related news, I just saw a picture of me on Facebook today that has inspired me to work even harder. As much as I REALLY don't want to, I'm posting it here:

EW. Like, what even IS that? Am I a turkey? I had no idea I had so many chins. Ugh. It just totally disgusts me. It makes me want to work out until I pass out and then never eat again.

Anyway. I needed to post that here for added inspiration. Maybe the next time I feel like eating chocolate or not counting points I'll remember this horrible picture. And then maybe I'll think about this bikini I desperately want to wear in the summer:

And I won't eat.

Weight Watchers

I've noticed that my own little "diets" haven't been working. There's no rules, there are no restrictions, there's no one 'watching' me to make sure I'm doing a good job. In other words, there's no structure. So, I decided to go back on Weight Watchers. I've had some success with WW before, so I decided to try it again.

Instead of doing the meetings, I did the online program. I'm a little worried about that - going to the meetings is inspirational, and the thought of someone else weighing me in also gives a little extra motivation. But I'm pretty busy with a weird work schedule, so I figured that the online program would just be easier.

I started yesterday with the points system. I weighed in at 137.9 pounds, which is lower than I thought I was, but still much too high for my height and body. At least it's not in the 140's - that way, if I even just lose 10 pounds in the next few months, I'll be in the 120's, and that's a less intimidating figure to go by.

I did decent yesterday. With this plan, I have to record everything I eat and get the points, which really makes me think hard about what I'm eating. I had enough time yesterday to plan out everything I was going to eat all day and to make both my lunch and dinner, which was a nice luxury.

So, yesterday. For breakfast I had 2 egg whites and a Fiber 1 bar, coming in at about 5 points. I like to start out my morning with low points - that way I don't feel stressed about the rest of the day. I made myself an AWESOME lunch. The only thing is, I ate earlier than I normally do, at like 12:30... so I was hungry too early. I need to eat lunch at around 1 or 1:30 from now on. Anyway, I got a yummy lunch recipe off of WeightWatchers.com. I figured since I was home with nothing else to do, I might as well make myself a nice little lunch. I made these pita sandwiches with hummus, cucumbers and lettuce in a lemon-dill dressing and with feta cheese. They were DELICIOUS. Definitely something I am going to have to make much more often! It was quick and easy and low points - only 8 for the whole pita. And it was filling. I really, really liked it.

I got hungry again by 2 though. I'm so used to mindlessly snacking that I guess I'm just hungry all the time. :( I wanted a healthy snack, but what I REALLY was craving was something bad for me. I tried to have an Eggo waffle with peanut butter spread on it, but it was disgusting and I couldn't finish it. I ate an orange and was still starving. So finally I caved and had some Eggo waffle cereal. I was so annoyed at myself but what can you do really?

I did get to go to the gym, which I was really happy about. I did a Step class and it was all cardio, kind of hard, and exhausting. It was pretty intense. That got me a few extra points.

Dinner was another delicious meal! I picked another recipe from WW, a kind of healthier fried rice. Brown rice, Swiss chard, carrots, scallions, ginger, snow peas, regular peas, and soy sauce - it was amazing. Seriously, I loved it. I had one and a half servings and could probably have had only one, but it was so yummy! It's definitely something I have to make more of. Vegetable fried rice is my absolute favorite thing to get at the Chinese place, and this was a much healthier alternative! Plus, I had leftovers. Since I'm interning today and will be home late, I'm just going to heat up one serving of that when I get home. I think I'll also make a salad full of veggies. I love that veggies and must fruits are only 0 points - I try to fill myself up on those when I'm hungry.

Oh! I also tried drinking a sip of water in between each bite during dinner last night. It slowed down my eating and definitely filled me up more. I was sooo full after dinner. And guess what? I went to the movies and didn't even get popcorn! That is an accomplishment - movie theater popcorn with butter is one of my favorite snacks EVER.

Today I have done okay. Not really a balanced breakfast and kind of high in points, but what can I say? I desperately need my coffee in the morning! I had my usual venti vanilla latte, but for the sake of points, I got it with nonfat milk. That was 6 POINTS. Ugh! Yes, I realize that that is wayyyyy too many points to be wasting on a liquid, but I LOVE my vanilla lattes! I don't want to give them up and I NEED the extra caffeine that comes in a venti!

I also had a Kellog fiber bar for breakfast, bringing my points total up to 9 so far. For lunch, I'm going to have 10 vegetable soup from Hale & Hearty - only 3 points for a large! I'm going to skip the bread though.

Knowing I was only going to have vegetable soup for lunch, I packed myself a little snack to get me through those 4-6 hunger pains: Carrots and snow peas. I also brought a bottle of water.

I just figured out that with my soup and my dinner tonight, that's all my points for the day! Those 9 points for breakfast are killing me. And tonight I really want to watch the Peoples Choice Awards so I don't even know if I'll have time to exercise! I need to figure out a no points salad to eat with dinner so I fill myself up enough!

I'll keep you updated on my progress. I know I always say that and then don't write in here for weeks, but I like Weight Watchers - so hopefully this will stick!